Ethan:Hila, is there anything better than lesbians?
*Ethan claps*
Eithan:YESSS
Ethan:Ahhh
Ethan:Anything?
Hila:The question seems incomplete.
Hila:What do you con-conclude?
Hila:What what else?..Ehhh....
Ethan:Anything, anything, just a couple of lesbians.
*Fwoop*
Ethan:OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Ethan:I make that joke, my friends...Because we are watching today a video called "Lesbians...
...Try kissing men for the first time."
Man:Do you want to make out ?
Woman:I mean, Do I have a choice?
Woman:GGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
*Silence*
Woman:G H H H H
Ethan:Hila, You like you don't want to know how many straight women I've turned lesbian. I'm the lesbian maker.
Hila:They just look at you.
Woman:G H H H
Ethan:D-Dude..Do...You don't even know how many women I've turned lesbian,just walking past me on the street.
Ethan:And furthermore this video has 22 million views!
Ethan:But why?...Why does this video have 22 million views?...And it's also the most popular video on "The Human Experiment."
Ethan:The HUMAN
Ethan:Experiment. Yes, we all love to experiment on humans
Ethan:Don't we? Alright Hila, now don't get any ideas here with these suave ass guys and their bomb-ass kissing
Ethan:Okay? Hila:Al...right. Ethan:Now we're married.YOU said vows to ME! Hila:I'll do my best, but... Ethan:Alright...Been hustling...
Ethan:You've been hustling dick!
*Hila laughs*
Nick:Hey what's up, I'm Nick.
Sam:Hi,I'm Sam.
Sam:Nice to meet you.
Woman:Hi,
Man:Hi~
Woman:How are you?
Alex:I'm well. I'm Alex. Portia:Nice to meet you Alex, I'm Portia.
Woman:Solang- Guy:Hola! - Woman:Hola. Guy:Solange?
Woman:You speak Spanish? Guy:No,jus-just Hola.
Woman:What do you do with your life?
*Both laugh*
Man:That's a really cute hairstyle, kinda reminds me of Tinkerbell.
Man:Tinkerbell [repeated 3 times]
Woman:I'll t-take that as a compliment....I think.
Ethan:it's an awful,awful compliment...Right?
Hila:Why are you trying to flirt?...Like, you're just supposed to kiss. Ethan:See, that's the part that gets me...All these guys...
Ethan:...Try flirting. He says she looks like Tinker Bell...!...I mean....?
Hila:It's not supposed to actually go anywhere....This is the human experiment.
*Ethan laughs*
Ethan:Yeah, I know. I'm trying to get some numbers and SMASH...Is what these guys are trying to do.
Ethan:Tinkerbell...? Man:"That's a really cute hairstyle, kinda reminds me of Tinkerbell"
Ethan:That guy obviously just wanted to smash Tinker Bell as a kid.
"That's a really cute hairstyle, kinda reminds me of Tinkerbell"
Ethan:This girl is meanwhile thinking that,'I'm so glad I'm not into guys'
Guy:So...
Guy:...I was gonna ask how old you are, but I know you're not supposed to ask a girl that.
Guy:Yeah... Woman:Yeah...
Guy:I'm the old guy. Woman:You're not old. Guy:I'm not used to being the old guy.
Guy:you have beautiful eyes, by the way. Girl:Thanks!
Guy:Uhhh...
Guy:I have to say that...l-like,there's yellow in the center.It's like really cool.
Ethan:[sarcastically]"Oh man, he's so charming. I'm reconsidering everything I ever thought about my own sexuality".
Hila:There's a little yellow in your eyes. -Ethan[sarcastically]:Ohhhh...God, oh man, he noticed the yellow in my eye?
Ethan[sarcastically]:"Nobody ever noticed the yellow in my eye before".
Ethan:Ohhhh...man!
Girl:Yeah, you look like you're gonna cry...
*Girl laughs*
Guy:Am I?
Girl;Yeah. Guy:I'm kinda nervous.
*high five*
Girl:So I think we're supposed to like...make out. Guy: Let's make out.
Guy:You want to make out?
Woman:I mean...Do I have a choice?
Woman:G H H H H
*Woman laughs*
G H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H HH HH H
Ethan:Why is this guy looking at her like he wants to eat her alive!?....I don't like him
*Hila laughs*
Ethan:I don't like anything about this guy. I feel bad for her.
Guy:I think you got a little...
Guy:No Woman:No Guy:No...Oh wait
*chin grab*
Guy:It's right here....
Ethan:Bro...that was...This guy is way too much for me. Hila:it's like he came out of,ehh.Expert village
*Ethan laughs*
Guy:If I see a girl with blue eyes, I might say...
Guy:w o w
Guy:Your,your eyes are like blueberries
Guy:Wait, can I actually? Can I actually...I'm kind of hungry.Can I-Can I have?
Guy:I think you got a little...
Guy:No Woman:No
Guy:No
Guy:Oh!...wait
*chin grab*
Guy:It's right here....
Ethan:Have you ever kissed someone like that?....
*chin grab*
Ethan[whispering]:Hey baby you got something right here.....
Hila:If you did that...It's kind of like a...
Hila:It's a red flag for me.
Ethan:The chin grab?
Hila:That's like the walk away.
Ethan:Excuse me. I'm trying to do something here.
Ethan:Hey, Hila, you got something right here.
Ethan:No, seriously, you got some shit.Oh,no, it was right here...
Ethan:It feels funny grabbing your chin like this
Hila:Because you shouldn't...
*chin grab*
Guy:Was that good?
Guy:Do we keep going?
Guy:Whatever Girl:Sure
Girl:Okay
*cringe intensifies*
Ethan:Okay, let's not act like that was cute...I feel like she was legitimately creeped out
Ethan:She's like,'all right, dude, the game's up!'
Hila:They're having this moment where like...
Hila:She can't let go
Ethan:Right
Hila:And She's like- Ethan:She's like, dude..
Ethan:I feel like that edge between social experiment and sexual assault may have just been crossed...like watch this slow mo of him.
Ethan:Pursuing her lips
Girl:Okay
Hila:What is the premise of the video?... like the people who put the video together?
Ethan:Mhm...
Hila:What are we supposed to learn? It's a kiss!
Ethan:So the thesis is...That lesbian...There's no such thing as lesbians
Ethan:They're pretending to be lesbians because they have never gotten a real kiss from a real gentleman before
Hila:That's your-
Ethan:That's the thesis.
Hila:That you made up
Ethan:OH MY GOD
Ethan:Dude you know
Ethan:It's bomb when it was produced by Jump cut Studios
Ethan:The last thing I would ever expect to hear from a production studios...You know what this needs?...More jump cuts.
Guy:All right
Hila:I mean the guys seem to really enjoy it. Ethan:Well, of course! The guys enjoy it that was never in question
Hila:But the girls are like,'yeah..whatever'
Ethan:Exactly!...All the girls like,'this was so awkward' and dudes are like,'I'm chubbed up like...'
Ethan:I thought we were...I thought we had a real connection
Hila:The video is called "Lesbians try kissing men. It's more like men try kissing lesbians Ethan:And one sexually assaulting
Girl:Okay
Guy:I don't know. I mean that's it's like what I usually do so....
C R I N G E
Ethan:Dude no....no dude....No...NO!
Ethan: N O!
Ethan:I Can't watch this!......Hila....
Hila:Yeah? Ethan:Can you cut?... Hila:I don't wanna watch the video
Ethan:Can you cut slits where my eyes are? So I don't have to expose my face to this
Hila:You're gonna cut your eye out.
Ethan:Better than watching another second of this! Oh my god! This is kind of horrifying
*Hila laughs*
Ethan:This is terrifying, Hila, I can't help but feel that this is somehow racist.
*Hila laughs*
Ethan:I don't know why but I just can't help but feel like there's something wrong with what we are doing here.
*Hila laughs*
Ethan:I can't explain it tho.
Bar mitzva Elmo:Bar mitzva Elmo thinks that your blackface is even better than,the gucci blackface :)
Ethan:I'm not in blackface bar mitzva!.I know that's completely...
Ethan:Inappropriate!. Where do you even learn these things?
Guy:Were you nervous at all? Girl:No Guy:I feel like I attacked you with that kiss. Girl:Yeah! You did!
Ethan:Why do you think this guy went so aggressive,was he trying to be seductive?
Hila:Um, I think he was just very passionate at the moment Ethan:Right Hila:And he thought
Hila:She was losing control over him Ethan:Right
Hila:Cause he is so unresistable
Ethan:All right. This was the beginning of a beautiful love affair. Hila:And that happens to them every day. Ethan:Right
Ethan:Sure, of course. Hila:But that was gonna change her life. Ethan:Right Hila:Forever
Ethan:Right. Guy:I'm that close to crying. Girl:I know
Girl:I was hoping that. Guy:You were hoping i was gonna cry?
Girl:I'm sorry, but it was awkward
Girl:It was....
Girl:The lips,the lips are so different.All girls have just wonderful soft lips.
Girl:This was my best kiss. Guy:Your best kiss?...I'm sorry
Guy:I'm sorry. Girl:That's okay. Guy: I was your best one.
Girl:Yeah Guy:Was it really?
Girl:No.
*Guy gulps*
*"No" echoes*
Girl:Okay.
*Police sirens*
*Guy gulps*
*woosh*
Girl:This was my best kiss.
Girl:Yeah Guy:Was it really?
Girl:No.
*Guy gulps*
*previous clips repeat*
Girl:Okay
Ethan:So in short, how did lesbians enjoy kissing men?...They didn't.
Hila:They did not enjoy it.
Ethan:Yeah, so Hila can you explain why this video has 22 million views?...The data was not interesting....
Ethan:Um,the drama was not there. Can somebody please explain why this has 22 million views?..Hila?
Ethan:You know when I'm putting in the title of this video....lesbians kissing lesbians!...Lesbiansssssss!!!
Ethan:GONE LESBIAN
Girl:This was my best kiss.
Guy:Your best kiss?...I'm sorry Girl:Yeah
Guy:I'm sorry. That was your best one. Girl:Yeah Guy:Was it really?
Ethan:Well for scientific purposes, the same channel has a video called "Gay men try kissing women"
Ethan:For the first time, how do you think this one turns out?
Guy:I'm gonna be 25 in 8 days
Girl:Oh,okay,you just looked alot younger
Bar mitzvah Elmo:Bar mitzvah Elmo knows that's what you call a "twink".He is a tight little gay man without any-
Ethan:Bar mitzvah Elmo,what is wrong with you?
Ethan:So Hila do you think that gay men are going to switch their sexual orientation after kissing a girl?
Hila:For sure. Ethan:Absolutely
Ethan:Huge woodies dude.But I don't think the women are gonna try so hard
Ethan:To convert them. Like, I feel like the men their masculinity is on the line. Hila:That's true
Ethan:If I don't convert this girl my dick,shrinks an inch
Ethan:Permanently
Ethan:So, let's see. Guy:I'm ready
Guy:Yeah,this is literally the first time I've ever kissed a girl so that'll be interesting.
Girl:I get to be your first girl kiss?! Guy:It's gonna be really special
Ethan:This video sucks cuz It is not as good at all. There's not enough lesbians. It doesn't have lesbians in the title
Ethan:It doesn't have awkward madhouse looking guys trying to seduce the lesbians. This video sucks.
Bar mitzvah Elmo:I nutted
Ethan:But it has 12 million views
Ethan:So let's keep watching
Girl:How was that? Guy:It was pretty normal
Ethan:Do you notice that they're not making out,it's just a peck,because nobody's trying that hard.You got none of this
Ethan:There's none of this happening. You know what I'm saying? Dudes kind of...dudes are gross. I'm sorry dudes are freakin gross
Hila:Did this video change you?
Ethan:Kind of! Like you don't see these,you don't see gay men being like or the girls being like,'hey, baby, you look like Tinkerbell'
Ethan:That being said I am...my,my Instagram Dms are open.Me and bar mitzva...
Ethan:Elmo have been thinking and we've got some ideas for some real human experiments. Hila, let me ask you this
Ethan:Can I drink some of your breast milk?
Hila:You can try it
Hila:I don't think you'll like it Ethan:I don't have plans but it seems like something you do when your.....
Ethan:....Wife is lactating, but I wouldn't drink it from the tip,alright?.I would drink it from like a bottle...
Hila:It's like...I don't think it's just like splashes....
Ethan:So...
Ethan: There we go.Now that's a video.Now. that's a human experiment...Girl,man tries...Sucks tip milk out for the first time.
Hila:I think Buzzfeed...
Hila: Has probably already done it. Ethan:Are you gonna try your own breast milk?
Hila:I didn't really think about it. Ethan:These are questions that as a woman who's expecting....
Hila:You would't like it,you would just be like,'gross'
Ethan:Well, I don't expect to make a habit of it.Be like,'Hey Hila can I get a glass of breast milk'
*Hila laughs*
Ethan:You know what I'm saying? the baby's got to eat.And I'm gonna be trying tip milk LIVE here on this YouTube channel.LIVE
Ethan:I'll be on one tit and Theodore will be on the other
Ethan:It's gonna be a thrilling.....
Ethan:....experiment a...
Ethan:SHOCKING experiment!
Hila:Interesting
Ethan:Am I?...Do I have your consent to do that?
Hila:No. Ethan:Oh
Ethan:Well, that didn't stop,ehh...a couple of these guys. Did it? And a big THANK YOU to Dollar Shave Club for sponsoring us
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Ethan:/H3h3.Link is in the description. Thank you for watching guys